I know it’s a small thing
I hate to be bitching,
But I don’t like the way things
Behave in my kitchen.

Time was when a dishwasher
And a stove – I’m not kidding –
Sat waiting with patience
To do my bidding.

Did they try to give orders?
No, not at all!
They obeyed when I flicked
The switch on the wall.

And the microwave too –
A convenient thing –
Would heat my food nicely
And stop with a ping.

They did what I asked
And they did it just right
They were calm, unobtrusive,
And always polite.

But these days it’s different:
They won’t wait to be told.
They think they know better,
They’re noisy and bold.

If I walk past my stove
Or my washing-machine,
They suddenly bleep,
Making me scream.

And the microwave’s worse:
When it’s finished its chore,
It shrieks on repeat
Till I dash to its door.

And yes, I’ve tried asking,
Who’s in charge here?
But their only response is
A LOUD buzzing sneer.

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Fiona M Jones (@FiiJ20 on Twitter) likes writing micro nature-themed poetic prose. You can’t write soulful stuff like that if your household appliances keep yelling at you. Twitter @FiiJ20.